Dear Diary,

I’ve always loved February 1st because it’s my dad’s birthday.  He would’ve been 72 years old today.  Wow.  Can’t believe it’s been almost 12 years since we lost him.  I do believe that good things are going to happen this month because good things always seem to happen right around his birthday.  This whole weekend I’ve been finding pennies in the most random of places.  Did you know that your loved ones who’ve gone to heaven drop pennies  to say “hi” to you?  Well, Evan, Charlie and I are convinced that’s what Grandpa Dave does.  Today, I found one in a spoon in a bowl that was soaking in the sink.  I also found one on the doorstep.  Everytime Evan finds one she looks up and says “Hi grandpa, I’m right here!

You know what else is pretty random that happened this week?  Dave’s been cleaning out our old storage unit and he brought over two boxes full of my stuff.  One of the boxes is a huge bin stuffed full of letter and cards ya’ll sent to me when my dad passed away in ‘98.  I kept every single one, and there are hundreds and hundreds.  They are sitting on my floor in front of me right now.  They make

me feel very comfortable and loved, not to mention blessed that I had such a cool, funny, smart handsome dad.

I’m writing this kinda late tonight, but I wanted to make sure that I wrote about my dad’s birthday before I doze off .  I love him so much.  Oh gosh, here come the tears.  I can’t believe I still miss him this much.  I usually don’t let myself think this deeply about it because that’s what always happens.  It’s a good cry though.  I just wish he could’ve met my babies.  In a strange way, I think Charlie has met him.  I know, I’m starting to sound like my mom, but I do believe that my dad helped my boy through his surgeries.  He was there.    Okay, it’s official, gotta go on a little crying binge.  Love you, Daddy.  You were the best dad any kid could ever want.  You made me who I am  and I miss you so much.

See you later, Diary.

Dad and me when I was eleven.